I managed to go to her talk yesterday in KL. So before I forget the essence of her talk, I'd blog about it first. (What I'm gonna write is based on my understanding, if there's a mistake in any of the points, I apologize in advance and pls correct me). Thanks.
1) Poor VS Rich
- When we face difficulties in life, we tend to turn to people/creation to release what we feel inside. But creations are like us, we are all poor. Everything that we own is from Allah and it's not ours. Allah can take back whatever is His. So, Allah is rich and we are poor. When we pray and make duaa, we are all like beggars actually (the hand in making dua - begging). So Allah is rich and we are poor. It's better to release what we feel to Allah and ask Allah for help than to relentlessly release what we feel inside to other people/creations.
Everyone has their own struggles in life, in many shapes and forms.
2) Sadness VS Despair/Hopelessness
- It's okay to feel sad when we have a problem. It's ok to cry. We're not robots.
BUT there's a difference between sadness and despair. Despair is similar to hopelessness. Whereas sadness is being sad but still hoping for an improved life and becoming a better person.
I used to train my heart to be a bullet proof organ to ensure that I only need to be positive and optimistic to face life. BUT i was DEFEATED right down to the ground. And i took a whole lot of time to recover and to pick up the broken pieces of my heart.
*not blaming anything/anyone, we all made mistakes. and things turned out like how they are now. it's also part of His plan, to train us to become better people and to worship Him more.
so, now, when im sad, i'll just cry. i cant pretend to be so strong or positive anymore. BUT i need to remind myself, i need to always remember Allah and slowly to be better each day. never lose hope. Believe and have hope that Allah is the Master of all plans and every one of His plan is the best for us.
We do not know but He knows best.
3) Our reaction/acceptance towards what we perceive as difficulties
-We might want something so badly or think that it's good for us, but Allah knows what's best for us.
An example given: A toddler watches his mother using a knife to cut up veges to cook, the toddler sees and wants to play with the knife. But the mother takes the knife away from him and scolds the toddler for wanting to play with the knife. The toddler throws a tantrum, resents, cries and mad at the mother.
Why? cos the toddler doesn't know but the mother knows the danger of the knife.
Maybe only when the toddler grows up to become an adult, then the toddler will know how to use the knife correctly without the danger. Or maybe there's another toy that the toddler will be better off with.
4) Test or Punishment?
-If the difficulties in life make you turn to Allah more, than it's not a punishment. It's Allah's way to save us. to remember to worship Him more.
The prescription for all: 1. Pray 2. Quran 3. Daily Duaa (she named it something else, cant remember)
All these 3 things are important to build the shelter whenever we need to seek refuge. In life, we never know when the next storm is going to hit us again. We need to equip ourselves with these 3-component prescription.
Remember: Shaytans are around to confuse us. They have vowed to lead us to the wrong path. So don't let them be our advisers and that's why we need to follow the prescription given.
6) Refuge - our protection
As mentioned above, our refuge is so important. We need to consistently maintain and build it. So that when we are tested or when calamities befallen upon us, we have the necessary shield and source to recover and not despair .
7) The strength of a believer
-The matter of a believer is that: everything that happens is good. No matter what it is, it is always good.
(This is hard, to me at least).
-A believer always believes that everything that happens has a hikmah and that Allah has arranged certain things for us to make us better. Sometimes, certain hardships in life make us finally come to our senses that no one can help us except Allah. 'Kun fayakuunnn'. If something is meant to happen and Allah has decided that it is our fate, nothing can change it.
A believer accepts and redha with whatever happens and seeks help from Allah.
Of course we need to work hard for what we want to achieve, but if all else fails, maybe that's what it is.
8) Nothing is ours except our iman
Everything we own is Allah's. So if something is taken away from you, it is not even yours at the first place.
If something is taken away, maybe we were meant to have it only for that period of time that Allah has planned for us.
But i believe in hope as well. I make duaa that if something or someone can make us both happy in this life and the life-after, please ease the way to achieve it. If not, maybe what has happened is the best.
- Sabr does not mean letting the oppression to continue and keep quiet. sabr also means that we act on it to stop any oppression that we see.
- As much as we want Allah to forgive ourselves, that is how we should forgive other people.
So, that's the recap on Ustadha Yasmin Mogahed's talk. I apologize again if I wrongly described anything.
Some of the points above may include some of my own words, here and there.